like wtf

gosh fucking damn like this week has been fucking awful , i seriously want to fucking kill myself, there is no hope in this world for me in this world , my bf and friends are better off with out me i cant stand being in this place , i hate being with my mom , im pissed at my dad and how he wont fucking let me stay with him , it pisses me off i fucking hate myself , im so fucking done . i have been not sad but fucking suicdal it makes me fucking misreable i dont know what to do  i have no one to talk to , and everyone that i want to talk to has their own problems and the cant handle my shit , everyone is fucking done with me and i am too , i really want to cut so fucking bad i seriously deserve so much worse , im such an awful person i dont deserve to live and have an amazing boyfriend , he do sooo much better then to deal with me and waste his time on me when he can find someone that will actually help him with his problems and make him happy and not more depressed like i do. i dont help any one not even myself