#7 9/29/14

so i dont know if this was a smart decision or not but yesterday i went to the hospital and (they didnt say this word per word) but they said that i was just fine and they sent me back home . back home seriously ?!? the reason i went there was because i didnt feel safe with myself being home like what the flip . i guess my problems dont matter to anyone.  

 

#6 9/25/14

things are getting to the point where i cry almost everyday ... people dont understand why i feel how i feel but latley i dont even know how to describe how i feel i guess i feel heart broken i dont know ... thats the only thing i think about the people that made me feel the way i feel i mean it sucks. because the guy i liked for such a long time said he loved me then he said he liked me "as a person" like you cant just say that and act like its something you can say ?! I believed him .. i actually loved him i cant get over him because i loved him !! i love him if he came back into my life right now and said he liked me id tell him i feel the same because i love him and hopefully ill be able to get over him but i dont know if i will because i really miss what we almost had...

#5 9/16/14

-lately i feel like things are getting bad again . i wont go in detail about the current events that are going on but i just need to vent on something thats not my journal . but when i say things or think things like i hate my self or think im ugly , im not fishing for compliments im not trying to cause drama or being a attention whore . i say these things or think these bad thoughts i mean it . i know that might sound kinda intense but right now its true . i can keep trying to distract myself but i cant just not feel how i feel , i cant just suddenly not be depressed and honestly i dont things will ever go back to how they were and i dont really know if thats a good thing or a bad thing yet but i guess ill figure that out 

-sandy